


Shameless

by fluffyweasley



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Book 5: Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix, Humor, Light-Hearted, M/M, Post- Fred and George's Exit, Pranks and Practical Jokes, Sexual Humor, Umbridge Bashing
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-05-24
Updated: 2017-05-24
Packaged: 2018-11-04 08:46:43
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 767
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10987449
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/fluffyweasley/pseuds/fluffyweasley
Summary: Fred and Lee decide to cause one last bang as a team.





	Shameless

The Common Room was slowly becoming void of the usual chatter as nearly everyone went to bed, with the exception of two students.

Fury coursed through Lee Jordan’s veins. “Blimey! That toad can’t just read our letters without our consent. Who does she think she is!? Barking I tell you.”

Fred glanced at Lee, a devious smirk etched upon his face. “Tell you what, I have a great idea.”

________________________________

Lee was still in awe at their exit. Despite being their right-hand man, watching everything unfold had been one of the best sights that he had witnessed.

And although he was glad that Fred and George were finally going to live their dream, a part of him ached. He’d truly miss the laughs that the three of them shared in the Common Room, mouthing off to Snape, Filch and Umbridge, always being up to no good and lastly the feel of Fred’s lips on his. Summer just couldn’t come sooner.

However, there was still something to be done. Lee’s eyes glinted mischievously, extracting the piece of parchment that Fred had left him out of his bag.

________________________________

_Lee’s eyes were as round as a Pygmy Puff, however a laugh escaped his lips. “You can be real creative when you want to be, huh?”_

_Furiously scribbling over a piece of parchment, Fred simply responded with a “Uh-huh.”_

_“Fred.”_

_“Lee?” He looked up._

_“Might want to try that one sometime.” Lee gave him a seductive wink._

_Fred batted his eyelashes in response. “Absolutely dear!”_

_“I love you but gross.”_

_“Anyway, I can’t wait to see that Toad’s face after reading all this.” Fred chuckled._

_“You truly are shameless, Weasley.” Lee chortled._

________________________________

Lee made his way to the Owlery to ‘send’ the piece of parchment to Fred.

“Hold it, Jordan!” A pug-faced Slytherin girl, accompanied by a short and stocky 2nd year Slytherin held out her arm. “Hand that parchment over to me.”

“It’s private! Don’t go sticking your noses into everything.” Lee commented.

“You know the rules and if you won’t oblige, we’ll be calling the headmistress herself!” The Slytherin 2nd year threatened.

“You wouldn’t.” Lee could hardly hold back the grin itching to be plastered across his face. All was going according to plan. “Now if you’ll excuse me, I’m going to go send a letter.”

“Hem-hem.”

The three students turned around to come face-to-face with the toad herself.

“Ah! Mister Jordan, what exactly might that be?” A sickly-sweet voice interrogated.

“A letter. It’s a form of communication between two people, in case you didn’t notice.” Lee retorted.

“And you’ll be handing it over to me, thank you. Accio.” And with a flick of her wand the letter was placed in Umbridge’s clutch.

“Go on then.”

Umbridge unfolded the letter and as her eyes scanned the parchment, her eyes bulged out of their sockets.

A high pitched scream left Umbridge’s throat. “What is the meaning of this!?” She demanded shrilly.

“A letter to my boyfriend. I told them that it was private. Well that’s what you get for sticking your nose into everybody’s business! I’m sure writing letters isn’t against any of your lovely Educational Decrees.” Lee answered.

“Uh Professor, if I may, what exactly is a blowjob?” The 2nd year questioned, a puzzled expression was plastered across his face as he attempted to read the letter over Umbridge’s shoulder.

It was becoming immensely difficult for Lee to stifle his laughter.

Umbridge’s face was red. “It’s nothing related to your education, Daniel. Off you go now!”

“Not even an orgasm?” Daniel’s eyes were wide with curiosity.

“OUT! NOW!”

Daniel, accompanied by a scandalised Pansy Parkinson scampered away.

“And you!” Umbridge pointed a stubby finger at Lee. “How dare you perform such activities in my school?”

“Well… we most tragically will not be performing them at school anymore, ever since Fred left.” Lee pretended to wipe a fake tear. “Besides it was just a letter! We weren’t criticising the Ministry, were we? You can’t control what we write in our letters.”

Umbridge’s nostrils flared with rage. “Detention. Mister Jordan. Tomorrow evening at 6 o’clock.” And with that, Umbridge stomped out of the Owlery.

An Umbridge with her nostrils flaring greatly resembled a pig-toad hybrid. Lee shuddered.

“Sure Professor! Make sure to have some biscuits ready. Only chocolate please.” He called out.

Lee swore under his breath at the thought of the detention. Nevertheless, Lee hurriedly withdrew a quill from his pocket and scribbled two words onto the bottom of the ‘letter’ that Fred and him had come up with. Fred would be pleased after receiving them.

_Mischief Managed._

**Author's Note:**

> I just really wanted to write something for Free because I absolutely adore the ship. Honestly, I just couldn't write some cute, simple fluff. Nope. For Fred and Lee I wanted to write something ridiculous and this ridiculous idea came up.
> 
> Anyways, feel free to leave a review or so. 
> 
> Tumblr: aphrodites-kisss


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